It happened again on Instagram. I was told what to do regarding my 'awra'. You know... it happens once.
That's fine. Second time. Ok, fine. But when so many people just send random messages about how I dress and how I sit and what I show...
Come on!!! Give me a break. The other times, I used to send these long messages... with some (subtle/not-so-subtle) self-defense.
Because truly that is what happens. We feel the need to defend ourselves in the face of criticism.
Even a minor one. But this recent time, I decided to just say, 'Thank you.' ⠀
Why is it that we feel self-defensive?
Yes, ok they reminded me of Allah's command. That's wonderful.
At the end of the day, I do I and you do you. Maybe this is more than just an Islamic rule reminder.
Maybe this is a bigger reminder of emotional intelligence? ⠀
Thinking in a broader term... I realized maybe we are getting a bit OVER-defensive?⠀
Yes, people make comments, but most make it with a good intention. Their comments don't mean they have figured out life nor have they perfected it.
So they may have more experience and/or expertise, and it's great that they felt comfortable enough to make a few points.⠀
And attacking them unfortunately makes THEM just as self-defensive as us. Then conversations go to areas nobody expected, leaving everyone sore and sour. ⠀
So why get self-defensive?
Why are we getting bothered by small words? To me, it seems like we need a little reminder on accepting criticism, evaluating if they are things we are willing to work on at this time, and if not, smile and say, 'Thank you.'⠀Criticism does not only happen on social media comments, and definitely not only within Muslim communities. It happens in all areas of our lives: from very personal relationships to professional ones.
So smile. And say, 'Thank you. I will consider it.'⠀Emotional intelligence is a big part of a Muslim mindset. Swipe ⬅️ to get do's and don'ts on emotional intelligence. 🌷Umeda